Ass famous quotes
Last updated: Sep 5, 2024
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When I fart my ***** makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
-- Adam Carolla -
Thanks a lot, society, for railroading my ass.
-- Aileen Wuornos -
Our countrymen have all the folly of the ***** and all the passiveness of the sheep.
-- Alexander Hamilton -
The furrier gets the skins of more foxes than asses.
-- Ambrose Bierce -
Quill: An instrument of torture yielded by a goose and commonly weilded by as ass.
-- Ambrose Bierce -
Pompous ***** knows how to put the moan in sanctimonious.
-- Andy Hargreaves -
I'm just living my life. I'm incredibly disciplined and I work incredibly hard. I show up for things on time, I do my homework, and I work my ***** off. I've had a lot of luck, but I work really, really hard.
-- Anna Paquin -
Patience is a flatterer, sir, and an ass, sir.
-- Aphra Behn -
If you're going to do something, strive to do it better than anyone else. Do it all the way. If you're going to half-ass it, why bother?
-- Ashly Lorenzana -
Have I played the part well? Then applaud as I exit!
-- Augustus -
I couldn't hit an elephant's ***** with a bull fiddle.
-- Babe Didrikson Zaharias -
Put your trust in the Lord....your ***** belongs to me. Welcome to Shawshank.
-- Bob Gunton -
A design isn't finished until someone is using it.
-- Brenda Laurel -
If you're not in the arena also getting your ***** kicked, I'm not interested in your feedback.
-- Brené Brown -
If you make an ***** out of yourself, there will always be someone to ride you.
-- Bruce Lee -
I have read more about Oprah Winfrey’s ***** than I have about the rise of China as an economic superpower. I fear this is no exaggeration. Perhaps China is rising as an economic superpower because its women aren’t spending all their time reading about Oprah Winfrey’s ass.
-- Caitlin Moran -
I always figured the American public wanted a solemn ***** for president, so I went along with them.
-- Calvin Coolidge -
If you're going to talk about me behind my back, at least check out my great ass.
-- Carole Radziwill -
At a certain age, you have to choose between your face and your ass.
-- Catherine Deneuve -
You tell Anderson Silva that I'm coming over and I'm kicking down his backdoor and patting his little lady on the ***** and I'm telling her to make me a steak, medium-rare just how I like it.
-- Chael Sonnen -
Most sportswriters don't know their ***** from a hole in the ground.
-- Charles Barkley -
I'm not allowed to see R-rated movies, but I did see 'Kick-Ass' because I'm in it. I'm not going to skip out on my own premiere!
-- Chloe Grace Moretz -
If you don't have a flag sticking out of your ass, you must be a communist.
-- Chrissie Hynde -
There's one thing you're better at than I am, and that's kissing Vince McMahon's ass. You're as good as kissing Vince's ***** as Hulk Hogan was. -To John Cena
-- CM Punk -
If you kill enough of them, they stop fighting.
-- Curtis LeMay -
Faith is rarely where your head is at. Nor is it where your heart is at. Faith is where your ***** is at!
-- Daniel Berrigan -
You know what wakes me up? A tongue in the ass. There is no alarm clock on that one, you are up, you are shaking, you are in a karate stance.....the day has begun.
-- Dave Attell -
You're better off with a kick-ass half than a half-assed whole.
-- David Heinemeier Hansson -
You really have to humble yourself and take your ***** whippings to understand that you can learn something from somebody
-- Dominick Cruz -
[picket sign] COGITO ERGO NOTHING!....[casual passerby:] "Cogito ergo your ass"....
-- Donald Barthelme -
She could have a Grammy I'd still treat her ***** like a nominee.
-- Drake -
Sometimes when we get our ***** kicked and we're down, sometimes we stay down, and sometimes we get depressed and sometimes we don't know how to handle it, and sometimes we don't know what's going on, and sometimes we feel like it's not worth going on.
-- Dwayne Johnson -
The room is there for the human being - not the human being for the room.
-- El Lissitzky -
Even a kick in the ***** is good when you're facing the right direction.
-- Elie Tahari -
I refuse to go out with a man whose ***** is smaller than mine.
-- Elizabeth Perkins -
Money will brainwash you and leave your ***** mindless.
-- Eminem -
You beef wit me, I'm-a even the score equally. Take you on Jerry Springer and beat your ***** legally.
-- Eminem -
The modern version of Buridan's ***** [a figurative description of a man of indecision] has a Ph.D., but no time to grow up as he is undecided between making a Leonardo da Vinci in the test tube or planting a Coca Cola sign on Mars.
-- Erwin Chargaff -
In the absence of orders, go find something and kill it.
-- Erwin Rommel -
I have sinned against my brother the ass.
-- Francis of Assisi -
My ***** contemplates those who talk behind my back.
-- Francis Picabia -
I don't know why people hire architects and then tell them what to do.
-- Frank Gehry -
I don't know where there can be so many pianists as in Paris, so many ***** and so many virtuosi.
-- Frederic Chopin -
I really don't know whether any place contains more pianists than Paris, or whether you can find more ***** and virtuosos anywhere.
-- Frederic Chopin -
Why is it there are so many more horses' ***** than there are horses?
-- G. Gordon Liddy -
My sense is that file sharing started in predominantly white, middle- and upper-middle-cl ***** young people who were native-born, who felt they were entitled to have something for free, because that's what they were used to.
-- Gene Simmons -
"Fussy eater" is a euphemism for "big pain in the ass."
-- George Carlin -
Don't let a kick in the ***** stop you. It's how you cope that says what you are.
-- George Cukor -
Patience is the virtue of an ass, who treads beneath his burden and complains not.
-- George Granville, 1st Baron Lansdowne -
The thirst for knowledge is like a piece of ***** you know you shouldn't chase; in the end, you chase it just the same.
-- George Pelecanos -
I'd enjoy it if a guy grabbed my ass. I guess it all depends on how he grabbed it, too.
-- Gerard Way -
I am a non discriminating driver. I want to kick everybody's ass!
-- Greg Ray -
it is not the lefty ass-kissers you have to agitate, but the objective left-wing...
-- Gudrun Ensslin -
Joan of Arc should be played as a "pain in the ass" and how do I know she was a "pain in the ass"? ... because they burn her at the end.
-- Harold Clurman -
The Carpetbaggers was the first big money I made. Money gave me a lot of freedom, but no matter how much you make there's always somebody chasing your ***** for more.
-- Harold Robbins -
The Wright Amendment is a pain in the ass, but not every pain in the ***** is a constitutional infringement.
-- Herb Kelleher -
I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ***** . . . and I'm all out of bubblegum.
-- Humphrey Bogart -
Dog's just want to sniff an ***** and eat some food.
-- Ice T -
Anyone can see that an ***** laden with books remains a donkey. A human being laden with the undigested results of a tussle with thoughts and books, however, still passes for wise.
-- Idries Shah -
Political cartoons are the ass-end of the artform
-- Ivan Brunetti -
If you're afraid to defend your convictions because you might get your ***** kicked for it, you're not really fit to advocate for them.
-- James Carlos Blake -
If a woman has a good ***** the rest of her wil be nicely configured too, except for maybe the face. The face is always on its own.
-- James Carlos Blake -
The next time somebody announces that he plans to get Medieval on your ass, tell him you're going to get Renaissance on his gonads.
-- James K. Morrow -
Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
-- James Mattis -
Aficionado my ass...I just love to smoke cigars
-- James Woods -
I really enjoy theater. I just went to see 'Death of a Salesman,' and it knocked me on my ass.
-- Jason Reitman -
When finding the right angle for a shot...'Move your ass.'
-- Jay Maisel -
Dressed in the lion's skin, the ***** spread terror far and wide.
-- Jean de La Fontaine -
I started running ultras to become a better person. I thought if you could run 100 miles you'd be in this Zen state. You'd be the Buddha, bringing peace and a smile to the world. It didn't work in my case. I'm the same old punk-ass as before, but there's always hope.
-- Jenn Shelton -
My ***** is big because a lot of people have to kiss it.
-- Jenni Rivera -
The art and act of writing - speaking just for myself - involves getting your proverbial ***** in the proverbial chair.
-- Jerry Stahl -
I doubt very greatly, however, that you'll kick my ass. But me and my ***** will enjoy your efforts.
-- Jessica Shirvington -
Novels are written, not wished into existence. You have to sit your ***** in the chair or nothing gets done.
-- John Dufresne -
You couldn't shoot a fart out of your own ass!
-- John Marston -
Looks like the good Lord got your ***** and face mixed up.
-- John Marston -
Soderquist's Paradox: There are more horses' ***** than horses.
-- John Peers -
I would kick this bad world's ***** if I could just get on my feet
-- Jon Bon Jovi -
If only all our conflicts could be resolved with a few grunts and a smack in the ass.
-- Jonathan Tropper -
I’m about to enter a national ass-kicking contest. With no legs. And a massive ass.
-- Julia Louis-Dreyfus -
It's possible that I shall make an ***** of myself. But in that case one can always get out of it with a little dialectic. I have, of course, so worded my proposition as to be right either way.
-- Karl Marx -
Potential is synonymous with getting your ***** kicked.
-- Kevin Constantine -
Whoa. He had ghouls on speed dial. My lawyer kicks so much ass.
-- Kevin Hearne
