Jack Dee famous quotes

One of my friends went on a murder weekendnow he is doing life for it
-- Jack Dee

#Murder

I tend not to trust people who live in very tidy houses. I know that on the surface there is nothing wrong with a person being well-ordered and disciplined. Nothing, except that it leaves the impression of that person having lived in the confines of a stark institution which, although he or she has long since left, remains within.
-- Jack Dee

#Long #People #House

In my local newspaper, they had this advert: 'please look after your neighbours in the cold weather'. I live next door to this 84-year-old woman, and do you know, not once has she come round to see if I'm all right. The lazy cow hasn't even taken her milk in for a fortnight.
-- Jack Dee

#Taken #Doors #Years

I have had issues with depression all my life, and it's probably true to say there was a tendency towards it even when I was very young, during my schooldays. There was often - and this is quite common with comics - a sense of not feeling as if I belonged anywhere.
-- Jack Dee

#Issues #Feelings #Common

I had a longing for ritual, something I could cling to, a routine to make me feel well and contented. I hoped that reading Bible commentaries and theological critiques would nudge me closer to some kind of absolute that I could hold up as a torch to light my way.
-- Jack Dee

#Reading #Light #Torches

I took religion much too seriously, however, and its overall effect was depressing. I would have really liked to discard it, but somehow I couldn't.
-- Jack Dee

#Depressing

One Saturday in 1984, I walked into my first AA meeting. I went regularly for six years and only stopped when I came to realize my underlying problem was not genuine alcoholism, but depression.
-- Jack Dee

#Years #Firsts #Six

I spent the first 25 years of my life not knowing what I wanted to do.
-- Jack Dee

#Years #Knowing #Firsts

Make lots of money. Enjoy the work. Operate within the law. Choose any two of three
-- Jack Dee

#Law #Two #Three

I love mixing with comedians when I'm working with them, but when I'm not I don't feel the need to hang around with them.
-- Jack Dee

#Comedian #Mixing #Needs

The rain forest has Sting. Now Siberia has Jack Dee. Someone had to draw the short straw. In this case it was the rain forest.
-- Jack Dee

#Rain #Forests #Siberia

The film industry is like Anne Robinsonalways on the look-out for a new face
-- Jack Dee

#Looks #Faces #Film

I hate people who think it's clever to take drugs... like custom officers.
-- Jack Dee

#Clever #Hate #Thinking

I was so keen to become a comedian that actually doing the comedy itself almost came second.
-- Jack Dee

#Comedian #Comedy

I really like rustic mediterranean cooking. And I like trying out curry takeaways.
-- Jack Dee

#Cooking #Trying #Curry

I was on various anti-depressants, but not for long - I didn't function very well on them. I felt sort of flattened out.
-- Jack Dee

#Long #Function #Wells

Maybe I fear things going wrong so much that I pre-empt them by not getting excited about them when they appear to be. going well.
-- Jack Dee

#Excited #Wells

Comedy and tragedy are two sides of the same coin. A talent in one area might also lead to a predisposition in the other.
-- Jack Dee

#Two Sides #Tragedy #Coins

People who are pro smacking children say, 'It's the only language they understand.' You could apply that to tourists.
-- Jack Dee

#Children #People #Tourists

Depression is something that has always figured in my life but now I'm dealing with it. I wish I'd done this years ago because it's been really helpful.
-- Jack Dee

#Years #Wish #Done

I think it is more a cautiousness that protects me from enthusiasm about things. I tend not to get excited. People perceive it as a scowl, which is fair enough.
-- Jack Dee

#Thinking #People #Cautiousness

I really hated fighting people and hurting them, but felt unable to stop.
-- Jack Dee

#Hurt #Fighting #People

But I like going to church. If you've been brought up in the Church of England, it feels like visiting an elderly relative. And I think it's important that part of the kids' education is knowing about the Bible.
-- Jack Dee

#Kids #Thinking #Elderly

Whenever you're in any acting role you are mortgaging your own character.
-- Jack Dee

#Character #Acting #Roles

My character, Rick Spleen, is a what-if version of me, really, where nothing did quite turn out right and everything else is still around the corner.
-- Jack Dee

#Character #What If #Spleen

In particular, I found praying very disturbing, like swimming with bricks tied to your feet. And yet I was drawn to it constantly.
-- Jack Dee

#Swimming #Feet #Bricks

In many ways, not fitting in has been a comedic asset and a comedic resource.
-- Jack Dee

#Way #Fitting #Assets

If I've inadvertently become some sort of role model for failed comedians, then it's really backfired very badly on me.
-- Jack Dee

#Role Models #Comedian #Roles

I don't like men who blow-dry their hair. If you are a man and you blow-dry your hair, then I don't like you and that's all there is to it.
-- Jack Dee

#Blow #Men #Hair

Well, I don't ever get excited. I haven't been excited since I got a Chopper bicycle when I was about 12. Once you get older you realise there's always a catch to everything. So when I get, say, a commission to make a TV show, the catch is that you have to deliver something and then the sense of responsibility overwhelms the joy of the occasion.
-- Jack Dee

#Responsibility #Tv Shows #Joy

I'm not really part of any group or clique or gang because that's always been my nature.
-- Jack Dee

#Groups #Gang #Clique

Mmmm... the comedy that matters is the comedy you pull out of thin air. It's a bit like when something funny has happened and you try to explain it to someone else and end up saying, 'You had to be there.
-- Jack Dee

#Air #Trying #Matter

And people are intrigued if I really am as grumpy in real life. People feel a bit let down if I'm laughing or smiling.
-- Jack Dee

#Real #Laughing #People

The jokes are great but what really matters for a comedian is his performance, his whole attitude, and the laughs that he gets between the jokes rather than on top of the jokes.
-- Jack Dee

#Attitude #Laughing #Comedian