Bill Cosby famous quotes

In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
-- Bill Cosby

#Inspirational #Positive #Success

Romance is a different word than sexual contact.
-- Bill Cosby

#Romance #Different #Contact

I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
-- Bill Cosby

#Inspirational #Motivational #Success

If I use the word romance, whether it's my wife or not, it does not mean sex. We can use the word sex when sex is there.
-- Bill Cosby

#Sex #Mean #Wife

Nothing I've ever done has given me more joys and rewards than being a father to my children.
-- Bill Cosby

#Family #Fathers Day #Children

Every romance does not lead to sex.
-- Bill Cosby

#Sex #Romance #Doe

People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what's bitter and move on.
-- Bill Cosby

#Inspirational #Moving On #Forgiveness

You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who've never had any.
-- Bill Cosby

#Family #Children #Parenting

Kids need to remember that when you put something on Twitter, it's not like whispering to your friend, you've put it on a billboard that the whole world, including your own kids someday, can see.
-- Bill Cosby

#Kids #Needs #Whispering

Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.
-- Bill Cosby

#Love #Inspirational #Life

The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it.
-- Bill Cosby

#Future #Afterlife #Goal

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.
-- Bill Cosby

#Life #Happiness #Laughter

The heart of marriage is memories.
-- Bill Cosby

#Anniversary #Memories #Heart

Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think - in a deeper voice.
-- Bill Cosby

#Love #Women #Valentine

Laughter brings out the child in all of us.
-- Bill Cosby

#Laughter #Children

I wasn't always black... there was this freckle, and it got bigger and bigger.
-- Bill Cosby

#Funny #Race #Racism

Take your bottom lip and pull it over your head.
-- Bill Cosby

#Over You #Lips #Bottom

The problem is that your daughter has given her heart to a 15-year-old boy, and a 15-year-old boy does not yet qualify as a human being.
-- Bill Cosby

#Mother #Daughter #Heart

The serve was invented so that the net could play.
-- Bill Cosby

#Play #Tennis

The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.
-- Bill Cosby

#Law #Promise #Firsts

The past is a ghost, the future a dream, and all we ever have is now.
-- Bill Cosby

#Love #Inspirational #Life

Poets have said that the reason to have children is to give yourself immortality. Immortality? Now that I have five children, my only hope is that they are all out of the house before I die.
-- Bill Cosby

#Children #Giving #House

I have to follow my thoughts and mine for the gold. I have to dig it out.
-- Bill Cosby

#Gold #My Thoughts

When I was a boy if a girl got pregnant the shame was placed on her and the boy could get away.
-- Bill Cosby

#Girl #Boys #Shame

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.
-- Bill Cosby

#Funny #Motivational #Family

When you carry a gun, you mean to harm somebody, kill somebody.
-- Bill Cosby

#Mean #Gun #Harm

The essence of childhood, of course, is play.
-- Bill Cosby

#Essence #Play #Childhood

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.
-- Bill Cosby

#Love #Family #Marriage

Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing.
-- Bill Cosby

#Fake People #Sleep #Eye

We are the only animals that let our kids come back home.
-- Bill Cosby

#Home #Kids #Animal

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers.
-- Bill Cosby

#Blow #Worst

Parents are not interested in justice, they're interested in peace and quiet.
-- Bill Cosby

#Family #Parenting #Justice

Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.
-- Bill Cosby

#Birthday #Funny Life #Mistake

If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.
-- Bill Cosby

#Fathers Day #Dad #Comfort

Nothing separates the generations more than music. By the time a child is eight or nine, he has developed a passion for his own music that is even stronger than his passions for procrastination and weird clothes.
-- Bill Cosby

#Family #Music #Children

Immortality is a long shot, I admit. But somebody has to be first.
-- Bill Cosby

#Cute Life #Long Distance #Firsts

Family is conflict and it's something that we all relate to.
-- Bill Cosby

#Family #Conflict #Relate

You can't compete with Walmart. But you can have smaller businesses that are successful.
-- Bill Cosby

#Successful #Walmart

I want all this loud profanity in the street stopped. I want people to think about choices.
-- Bill Cosby

#Thinking #People #Choices

Social networking helps reach people easier and quicker.
-- Bill Cosby

#People #Networking #Helping

One of the great mistakes that can be made by a man of my age is to get involved in athletic competition with children-unless, of course, they are under six. And even then, stay away from hide-and-seek.
-- Bill Cosby

#Children #Mistake #Men

we cannot afford to settle for being just average; we must learn as much as we can to be the best that we can. The key word is education - education with maximum effort. Without it, we cannot be in charge of ourselves or anyone else.
-- Bill Cosby

#Educational #Keys #Average

Why do kids always say peace out, I though peace was in.
-- Bill Cosby

#Kids

Nobody ever says, "Can I have your beets?
-- Bill Cosby

#Beets

I am not afraid of crashing, my secret is . . . just before we hit the ground, I jump as high as I can.
-- Bill Cosby

#Secret #Aviation #Not Afraid

A father... knows exactly what those boys at the mall have in their depraved little minds because he once owned such a depraved little mind himself. In fact, if he thinks enough about the plans that he used to have for young girls, the father not only will support his wife in keeping their daughter home but he might even run over to the mall and have a few of those boys arrested.
-- Bill Cosby

#Girl #Daughter #Running

Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you're pouring, or drinking.
-- Bill Cosby

#Drinking #Glasses #Pouring

In spite of the six thousand manuals on child raising in the bookstores, child raising is still a dark continent and no one really knows anything. You just need a lot of love and luck - and, of course, courage.
-- Bill Cosby

#Courage #Children #Dark

YOU are a genius!... and I am a genius because I married you.
-- Bill Cosby

#Genius #Married

A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
-- Bill Cosby

#Fathers Day #Children #Dad

I am certainly not an authority on love because there are no authorities on love, just those who've had luck with it and those who haven't.
-- Bill Cosby

#Love #Love You #Luck

If you speak your mind and if it is true what you're saying, then I think the integrity of what you're saying carries through.
-- Bill Cosby

#Integrity #Thinking #Mind

I often try to tell kids to think about all the people who love you, don't cry over the one person who doesn't.
-- Bill Cosby

#Love #Kids #Thinking

Men and women belong to different species and communications between them is still in its infancy.
-- Bill Cosby

#Communication #Sisterhood #Men

I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread.
-- Bill Cosby

#Uplifting #Memorial Day #Native American

When you introduce competition into the public school system, most studies show that schools start to do better when they are competing for students.
-- Bill Cosby

#School #Competition #Students

There are some people who have trouble recognizing a mess.
-- Bill Cosby

#People #Trouble #Mess

Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them.
-- Bill Cosby

#Civilization #Comedy #Open Minded

It isn't a matter of black is beautiful as much as it is white is not all that's beautiful.
-- Bill Cosby

#Funny #Beautiful #Hair

Parents are people who yell and they yell and they yell and they yell. And you already have the point... and they're still yelling.
-- Bill Cosby

#Yelling #People #Parent

When you become senile, you won't know it.
-- Bill Cosby

#Hypocrisy #Age #Comedy

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.
-- Bill Cosby

#Motivational #Baby #Children

My father established our relationship when I was seven years old. He looked at me and said, “You know, I brought you in this world, and I can take you out. And it don't make no difference to me, I'll make another one look just like you.
-- Bill Cosby

#Father #Years #Differences

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.
-- Bill Cosby

#Education #Sex #Believe

If a white man falls off a chair drunk, it's just a drunk. If a Negro does, it's the whole damn Negro race.
-- Bill Cosby

#Fall #Men #Race

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.
-- Bill Cosby

#Funny #Fathers Day #Dad

You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.
-- Bill Cosby

#Life #Laughter #Humor

No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.
-- Bill Cosby

#Family #Kids #Parenting

I know people are tired of me not saying anything, but a guy doesn’t have to answer to innuendos,
-- Bill Cosby

#Tired #People #Guy

I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.
-- Bill Cosby

#Baby #Children #Real

There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.
-- Bill Cosby

#Funny #God #Hope

My children love my mother, and I tell my children, that is not the same woman I grew up with...That is an old woman trying to get into heaven now.
-- Bill Cosby

#Family #Mother #Children

Old is always fifteen years from now.
-- Bill Cosby

#Birthday #Years #High School

There is no labor a person does that is undignified; if they do it right.
-- Bill Cosby

#Work #Quality #Doe

Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
-- Bill Cosby

#Funny #Mom #Children

Anyone can dabble, but once you've made that commitment, your blood has that particular thing in it, and it's very hard for people to stop you.
-- Bill Cosby

#Success #Determination #Commitment

The mother may be doing ninety percent of the disciplining, but the father still must have a full-time acceptance of all the children. He never must say, "Get these kids out of here; I'm trying to watch TV." If he ever does start saying this, he is liable to see one of his kids on the six o'clock news.
-- Bill Cosby

#Mother #Children #Father

It doesn't make any difference how much money a father earns, his name is always Dad-Can-I.... Like all other children, my five have one great talent: they are gifted beggars. Not one of them ever ran into the room, looked up at me, and said, "I'm really happy that you're my father, and as a tangible token of my appreciation, here's a dollar.
-- Bill Cosby

#Appreciation #Dad #Children

If you know what you want, you will recognize it when you see it.
-- Bill Cosby

#Want #What You Want

It's more blessed to give than to receive -- especially kittens.
-- Bill Cosby

#Blessed #Giving #Kitten

The most important educational vehicle in all life is a parent figure.
-- Bill Cosby

#Educational #Parent #Important

You can not make everybody happy..
-- Bill Cosby

#Can Not

Education happens to be something that all people, all cultures, need to embrace. Math, science, the words of the world. To be able to speak and be able to have clarity and to be able to think. Those are the greatest of gifts.
-- Bill Cosby

#Math #Thinking #People

Don't talk yourself into not being you.
-- Bill Cosby

You can teach an old dog new tricks. You just don't want to see the dog doing them.
-- Bill Cosby

#Dog #Humorous #Want

You can't be everything to everyone
-- Bill Cosby

People should fact check. People shouldn’t have to go through that and shouldn’t answer to innuendos.
-- Bill Cosby

#People #Answers #Facts

If you know two languages, the level of your intelligence is multiplied a hundredfold in other people's eyes.
-- Bill Cosby

#Eye #Two #People

With my wife Camille's help, I took to social networking. I'm working with the computers.
-- Bill Cosby

#Wife #Networking #Helping

Your parents put a curse on you - Someday your kids are going to act just like you.
-- Bill Cosby

#Children #Kids #Parent

A word to the wise ain't...
-- Bill Cosby

#Wise #African American #Wise Words

All men should freely use those seven words which have the power to make any marriage run smoothly: You know dear, you may be right
-- Bill Cosby

#Running #Men #Use

These people marched and were hit in the face with rocks to get an education and now we've got these knuckleheads walking around.
-- Bill Cosby

#Rocks #People #Knuckleheads

I recently turned fifty, which is young for a tree, mid-life for an elephant, and ancient for a quarter-miler, whose son now says, "Dad, I just can't run the quarter with you anymore, unless I bring something to read."
-- Bill Cosby

#Running #Dad #Son

Our children are trying to tell us something, and we are not listening.
-- Bill Cosby

#Children #Listening #Trying

Any husband who says, "My wife and I are completely equal partners," is talking about either a law firm or a hand of bridge.
-- Bill Cosby

#Funny Love #Husband #Hands

There are no absolutes in raising children. In any stressful situation, fathering is always a roll of the dice. The game may be messy, but I have never found one with more joys and rewards.
-- Bill Cosby

#Children #Games #Joy

Why do I have to feed the kids? They just ate twelve hours ago!
-- Bill Cosby

#Funny #Kids #Twelve

I said to a guy, "Tell me, what is it about cocaine that makes it so wonderful," and he said, "Because it intensifies your personality." I said, "Yes, but what if you're an asshole?"
-- Bill Cosby

#Funny #Personality #Guy

Pay off your student loan. Even if you don't have a job...Because when you finally get a job you're going to be one of us.
-- Bill Cosby

#Jobs #Funny Graduation #Pay