Wanda Sykes famous quotes

I'm a black, gay woman. I think the only way to make the GOP hate me more is if I sent them a video of me rolling around on a pile of welfare checks.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Hate #Gay #Thinking

When my wife and I leave California, I want to have my marriage recognized in Nevada, Arizona, all the way to New York. How can you stop people from loving each other? How can you get upset about loving?
-- Wanda Sykes

#New York #Gay #California

I'm here today because I refused to be unhappy. I took a chance.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Funny Inspirational #Unhappy #Today

It's not until you develop your own voice, your own persona onstage that you become your own comic, who you really are.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Voice #Comic #Persona

If you don't believe in same-sex marriage, then don't marry somebody of the same sex.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Sex #Believe

If you feel like there's something out there that you're supposed to be doing, if you have a passion for it, then stop wishing and just do it.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Inspirational #Passion #Wish

I enjoy stand-up because it has the biggest reward: instant gratification. You can hear the people laughing.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Laughing #People #Rewards

Don't bother me while I'm eating, or when I'm coming out of the crackhouse or something. Just let me get going.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Ice Cream #Eating #Coming Out

Some government workers are dedicated and work hard, but most of them are just waiting to retire.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Funny #Hard Work #Government

I'm proud to be a woman. I'm proud to be a black woman, and I'm proud to be gay.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Gay #Black #Proud

These CEOs, man ... If you're that ruthless, you're a scary dude. I tell you, now when I walk past a little gang banger, I don't even blink. But if I see a white dude with a Wall Street Journal, I haul ass. Before I walk past the Arthur Andersen building, I cut through the projects. If you cut through the projects, you may just lose what you have on you that day. I ain't never been mugged of my whole future.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Wall #Cutting #Past

Women and our right to choose were going to be challenged with Ashcroft around. When Bush appointed Ashcroft, I went out and got me four abortions. I stocked up. The doctor was like, "Listen, you're not pregnant." I said, "Hey, just shut up and do your job. I'm exercising my right while I can, dammit.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Jobs #Exercise #Doctors

I work hard. The staff and crew see how much energy I put into this project, and it makes them step up.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Hard Work #Steps #Energy

Seriously, I don't need a gun. I'm easily annoyed. I would shoot people in my house that I invited over.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Gun #People #Annoyed

white criminals commit the biggest crimes.a brother might rob a bank. a white man will rob a pension fund. the brother is going to get ten to fifteen years because he had a gun. the white guy is going to get a congressional hearing because he had a job and a nice suit.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Brother #Jobs #Nice

I'm always thinking of stuff; I just don't sit down and write it. I come up with material more as I go along; if something funny happens, I'll make a note of it on my phone.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Writing #Thinking #Phones

It's hard to get fired from the government. You have to, like, kill people.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Government #People

I don't like doing the same material over and over again. It's not fun.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Fun #Materials

Usually, there's nothing being thrown toward the stage or at me. Then I feel pretty good about it.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Stage #Feels #Thrown

I watched a lot of comedy growing up.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Growing Up #Growing #Comedy

I don't understand why people really get upset about something that doesn't affect them at all.
-- Wanda Sykes

#People #Upset

I have problems with YouTube and things like that, when you catch it mid production. If I'm doing a show and I'm working on a bit and someone's there with a phone, they record it and put it online - it's not the finished product.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Phones #Records #Problem

When I'm not on T.V. or working on a movie, I'm on the road doing stand-up. That's my roots.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Roots

I noticed recently, in the last few shows I did, that I'm starting to get people - not a large group, but quite a few people - who come to see me because they love Curb Your Enthusiasm.
-- Wanda Sykes

#People #Groups #Enthusiasm

If something stinks, I say it stinks. But I try to massage it a little and not be as cutting, come behind it with a joke: Hey, I cut you deep, but now let me put a couple of stitches in you.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Couple #Cutting #Trying

The first time onstage, a light went on. 'OK, this is my thing. I'm comfortable here. This is my thing.'
-- Wanda Sykes

#Light #Firsts #First Time

As soon as you say 'I do,' you'll discover that marriage is like a car. Both of you might be sitting in the front seat, but only one of you is driving. And most marriages are more like a motorcycle than a car. Somebody has to sit in the back, and you have to yell just to be heard.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Marriage #Car #Motorcycle

Then you had people who wanted to get into comedy just to get a TV deal.
-- Wanda Sykes

#People #Tvs #Comedy

Men don't hear women.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Men #Comedy

I think it's because my comedy is in your face, and it comes from a place that's real.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Real #Thinking #Faces

I always want to go back and do stand-up; I like the freedom.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Want #Comedy

But I think funny and talent will always win out; I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Mean #Winning #Thinking

And then also I think it's harder for women because comedy is so opposite of being ladylike.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Thinking #Opposites #Comedy

It seems like when I first started, people got into comedy because they wanted to be good comedians.
-- Wanda Sykes

#People #Comedian #Firsts

Men are dogs. Men are dogs. We got to stop it. Men are not dogs. Uh-uh. Dogs are loyal.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Dog #Men #Loyal

I'm finally just relaxed and comfortable with who I am.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Who I Am #Relaxed

I watch Jay. I watch 'Letterman'. I flip back and forth between 'Conan' and 'Letterman', especially the top of the show for those guys.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Guy #Flip #Watches

I was funny around my family. My family, they're pretty funny, too.
-- Wanda Sykes

#My Family

I guess because of my act, people think that I say things they want to say, and that they can just come up and say anything to me.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Thinking #People #Say Anything

I like doing a bunch of different things, being all over the place.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Different #Bunch

We never hid anything from the kids. I feel whole again, I really do. I've told them, 'Mommy's boo-boo is much better now.'
-- Wanda Sykes

#Cancer #Kids #Feels

L.A. is nothing but a bunch of driving, and I hate all that damn driving 'cause it interferes with my drinking.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Hate #Drinking #Causes

Being gay is harder than being black. I didn't have to come out black. I didn't have to tell my parents about what its like to be black.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Gay #Parent #Black

I'm here today because I hated everything else.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Women #Today #Hated

I love Costas. He's knows too much, but he's a good guy.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Guy #Too Much #Comedy

I have a funny family, but none of them are remotely in show business.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Funny Family #Comedy #Shows

But sometimes the women writers will pitch something and I'll hear it, but the men will keep talking.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Men #Talking #Comedy

A woman would pitch a joke. Nothing. Then a guy would pitch it and everybody would laugh.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Laughing #Guy #Comedy

It's easier to rip somebody to shreds while you're making them laugh.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Rip #Laughing #Easier

I'm going to leave The Wanda Sykes Show and try to get her job because $5 million ain't too bad!
-- Wanda Sykes

#Jobs #Trying #Shows

I think Rush Limbaugh was the 20th hijacker but he was just so strung out on Oxycontin he missed his flight ... Rush Limbaugh - I hope the country fails. I hope his kidneys fail, how about that? He needs a waterboarding, that's what he needs.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Country #Thinking #Dumb

In '87, I used to do this awful, awful James Brown impression.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Awful #Brown #Used

I really can't pinpoint the one moment when I said I want to be a comic.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Want #Moments #Comic

What drives the creative person is that we see it all.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Creative #Persons

My worlds collide. When one things happens, it just starts a domino effect - everything else goes on.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Goes On #World #Collide

I'm really funny now.
-- Wanda Sykes

How can you stop people from loving each other? How can you get upset about loving?
-- Wanda Sykes

#People #Upset

If you're passionate about your work, it makes the people around you want to be involved too.
-- Wanda Sykes

#People #Want #Passionate

It wasn't until I became more confident with myself and I put myself forward instead of the jokes; at first it was put the jokes out there and I'm just behind the jokes.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Firsts #Behinds #Jokes

I hope his kidneys fail, how about that? He needs a waterboarding, that's what he needs.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Kidneys #Needs #Failing

I think the worst one [indian mascot] is the Cleveland Indians' Big Chief Wahoo. It's just a red face on a baseball with a big, toothy grin. It's the Sambo of all other offensive mascots. I have never seen a Native American smile that hard before, not even at a casino opening.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Baseball #Native American #Thinking

Should I talk about [having breast cancer]? Because how many things could I have? You know black, lesbian - I'm like, I can't be the poster child for everything. At least with the LGBT issues we get a parade and a float and it's a party.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Children #Cancer #Party

Actually, I majored in marketing and I have a bachelor of science.
-- Wanda Sykes

#Marketing #Bachelors