Lisa Lampanelli famous quotes
Last updated: Sep 5, 2024
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I'm decorating my parents' house for Christmas... I hope they find my manger with a baby yeezus in it as funny as I do!
-- Lisa Lampanelli -
Jeff Foxworthy is a legend. Every time I see his moustache it reminds me to wax my lip and every time I hear his jokes it reminds me to wipe my ass.
-- Lisa Lampanelli -
Larry the Cable Guy has everything: sleeveless shirts, stupid catchphrases. He's Mr. T without the acting chops.
-- Lisa Lampanelli -
Usually I'm on top to keep the guy from escaping.
-- Lisa Lampanelli -
Even going on stage is a service because it brings people up from thinking about their lost job or their lost spouse or something like that, so that even helps people when I'm doing comedy; it's all done to make them laugh.
-- Lisa Lampanelli -
A lot of comics just joke around, but it's just as important to get the truth out there.
-- Lisa Lampanelli
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I am equal to a baby and to a hundred year old lady. I am equal to an airline pilot and a car mechanic. I am equal to you. You are equal to me. It's that universal. Except that it's not.
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I have a dog and sometimes I'll be the littlest kid with my dog and marvel at his ears and his nose and how he looks at me. If he died, I'd bawl like a baby.
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All the evidence that we have indicates that it is reasonable to assume in practically every human being, and certainly in almost every newborn baby, that there is an active will toward health, an impulse towards growth, or towards the actualization.
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If you look around Brazil you see pregnant women everywhere. Here you don't see that as much. There the only thing they do is babies, babies, babies! Especially the poor families.
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My bursting heart must find vent at my pen.
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It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
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I believe the collapse of the House of Windsor is tied in with the collapse of the Church of England.
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She frowned."You're not very friendly." I let out a short laugh."What?I'm not friendly to a ghost who floats into my house and starts touching me?Well,excuse my rudeness but this is a little disturbing.
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I think when I bought a house, that's when I thought I felt like that's a grown up thing to do.
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The work of art is brought into the world without there being a need for it. The house satisfies a requirement. The work of art is responsible to none; the house is responsible to everyone. The work of art wants to draw people out of their state of comfort.
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