"Babies are like poems. They're beautiful to their creator, but to other people, they're silly and they're irritating."

-- Doug Stanhope

#Funny Quotes #Beautiful Quotes #Baby Quotes

“You're alive!" Fezzik cried. The man in black sat immobile, like a ventriloquist's dummy, just his mouth moving. "That is perhaps the most childishly obvious remark I have ever come across...”
“I'm surrounded by very powerful women and very progressive men.”
“The outcome is not up to you. The outlook is.”
“I feel that women and men should free themselves up. It took me a while to get over my dysphoria about shopping in the men's section, trying on men's clothes, but when I was thinking about my life and the kind of woman I wanted to be, it was never just this by-the-book feminine thing.”

Source : Source: wwd.com
“There's only one thing that matters, CUSTOMER SATISFACTION”
“the African leopard is an audacious animal, although it is ungrateful of me to say a word against him, after the way he has let me off personally ... taken as a whole, he is the most lovely animal I have ever seen; only seeing him, in the one way you can gain a full idea of his beauty, namely in his native forest, is not an unmixed joy to a person, like myself, of a nervous disposition.”

Source : Mary Kingsley (2010). “Travels in West Africa, Congo Français, Corisco and Cameroons”, p.543, Cambridge University Press
“Think of anger as a muscle. The way you express anger isn't the way that I do, or you. If you have a good director, you will find that he's getting you to use an entirely different muscle that you never even knew you had - it's real hard and sore, then after a while it becomes normal. And you discover all these new muscles when you enter a new character - that's what a director does for you.”
“Beyond the town, darker than dark, King Haggard's castle teetered like a lunatic on stilts...”

You may also like:

Bill Burr
Comedian
Bill Hicks
Comedian
Dave Attell
Comedian
Doug Benson
Comedian
George Carlin
Comedian
Jim Jefferies
Stand-up comedian
Joe Rogan
Stand-up comedian
Louis C. K.
Comedian
Mitch Hedberg
Comedian