Mae West famous quotes

In my long and colorful career, one thing stands out: I have been misunderstood.
-- Mae West

#Careers #Long #Misunderstood

When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better.
-- Mae West

#Life #Tattoo #Sexy

Never ask a man where he has been.
-- Mae West

#Men

The finest woman that ever walked the streets.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Finest #Streets

You gotta get up early in the morning to catch a fox and stay up late at night to get a mink.
-- Mae West

#Morning #Night #Foxes

Poor Mary Ann! She gave the guy an inch and now he thinks he's a ruler.
-- Mae West

#Thinking #Guy #Poor

When in doubt take a bath
-- Mae West

#Inspiring #Doubt #Baths

For a long time I was ashamed of the way I lived. Did I reform, you ask? No. I'm not ashamed anymore.
-- Mae West

#Psychics #Long #Empowerment

Let's get out of these wet clothes and into a dry Martini...
-- Mae West

#Beer #Clothes #Dry

Don't come crawlin' to a man for love-he likes to get a run for his money.
-- Mae West

#Love #Running #Men

Let men see what's coming to them, and women will get what's coming to them.
-- Mae West

#Women #Men #Let Me

A good man is hard to find -- but you'll mostly find him asleep.
-- Mae West

#Men #Good Man

Is that a pistol in your pocket or are you just glad to see me? (She made this remark in February 1936, at the railway station in Los Angeles upon her return from Chicago, when a Los Angeles police officer was assigned to escort her home)
-- Mae West

#Home #Sassy #Police

The censors wouldn't even let me sit on a guy's lap, and I've been on more laps than a table-napkin.
-- Mae West

#Guy #Lap #Tables

Never mind about the six feet. Let's talk about the seven inches.
-- Mae West

#Feet #Mind #Six

Women are as old as they feel and men are old when they lose their feelings.
-- Mae West

#Women #Men #Feelings

A man has more character in his face at forty than at twenty - he has suffered longer.
-- Mae West

#Character #Men #Twenties

Don't keep a man guessing too long - he's sure to find the answer somewhere else.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Sexy #Being Single

[On the metaphysical:] ... I knew in some marvelous way I had touched the hem of the unknown. And being me, I wanted to lift that hemline a little bit more.
-- Mae West

#Hem #Littles #Way

A girl in the convertible is worth five in the phone book.
-- Mae West

#Girl #Book #Phones

Marriage? I ain't got time for a husband or child. All my life I've looked after myself as if I was my own child.
-- Mae West

#Children #Husband #Singles

It is better to be looked over than overlooked.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Sexy #Women

A woman in love can't be reasonable - or she probably wouldn't be in love.
-- Mae West

#Love #Funny #Life

I only have 'yes' men around me. Who needs 'no' men?
-- Mae West

#Sassy #Men #Needs

Curve: The loveliest distance between two points.
-- Mae West

#Women #Distance #Curves

To err is human, but it feels divine.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Sexy #Clever

I have always felt a gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself.
-- Mae West

#Shining #Jewelry #Diamond

Sex is emotion in motion.
-- Mae West

#Love #Life #Sex

I'm a good woman for a bad man.
-- Mae West

#Men #Good Woman

Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
-- Mae West

#Love #Marriage #Single

All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.
-- Mae West

#Love #Sad #Boyfriend

Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I'm tired.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Humorous

Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Appreciation #Witty

Ladies who play with fire must remember that smoke gets in their eyes.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Women

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Witty #Women

Love thy neighbor - and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.
-- Mae West

#Love #Funny #Anniversary

Everyone has the right to run his own life- even if you're heading for a crash. What I'm against is blind flying.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Running #Witty

I have never loved a man as much as I have loved myself
-- Mae West

#Men

I like a man who's good, but not too good - for the good die young, and I hate a dead one.
-- Mae West

#Hate #Men #Young

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Humorous

It takes two to get one in trouble.
-- Mae West

#Two #Trouble

She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Success #Girl

Everything's in the mind. That's where it all starts. Knowing what you want is the first step toward getting it.
-- Mae West

#Inspirational #Knowing #Mind

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Two #Evil

You can do what you want, but saving love doesn't bring any interest.
-- Mae West

#Saving #Want #What You Want

It ain't no sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.
-- Mae West

#Law #Long #Cracks

I've been in more laps than a napkin.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Sarcastic #Witty

Women with pasts interest men because they hope history will repeat itself.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Sarcastic #Witty

You are never too old to become younger!
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Humorous

Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from.
-- Mae West

#Relationship #Women #Independent

Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.
-- Mae West

#Love #Funny #Money

A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.
-- Mae West

#Relationship #Confidence #Sarcastic

The curve is more powerful than the sword.
-- Mae West

#Powerful #Curves

Kiss and make up-but too much makeup has ruined many a kiss.
-- Mae West

#Kissing #Makeup #Too Much

I consider sex a misdemeanor, the more I miss, de meaner I get.
-- Mae West

#Sex #Missing

I don't like myself, I'm crazy about myself.
-- Mae West

#Crazy #Self Confidence

When women go wrong, men go right after them.
-- Mae West

#Women #Memorable #Temptation

I made myself platinum, but I was born a dirty blonde.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Humorous

When it comes to finances, remember that there are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin.
-- Mae West

#Money #Wages #Remember

Love is like a booger, you pick and pick at it. Then when you get it you wonder how to get rid of it.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Sarcastic #Witty

Virtue has its own reward, but no sale at the box office.
-- Mae West

#Office #Rewards #Virtue

Opportunity knocks for every man, but you have to give a woman a ring.
-- Mae West

#Opportunity #Men #Giving

I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Real

Men are all alike - except the one you've met who's different.
-- Mae West

#Men #Different #Mets

I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Humorous

I like my clothes tight enough to show I'm a woman, but loose enough to show I'm a lady.
-- Mae West

#Fashion #Clothes #Style

Getting married is like trading in the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one.
-- Mae West

#Marriage #Sarcastic #Witty

Why don’t you come up and have a little ... scotch and sofa?
-- Mae West

#Scotch #Littles #Sofas

Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.
-- Mae West

#Funny Love #Running #Freedom

I speak two languages, Body and English.
-- Mae West

#Two #Body #Language

It's not the men in my life that count, it's the life in my men.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Life #Marriage

Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Sarcastic #Witty

I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them.
-- Mae West

#Sexy #Curves

A hard man is good to find.
-- Mae West

#Love #Life #Anniversary

One and one is two, and two and two is four, and five will get you ten if you know how to work it.
-- Mae West

#Two #Four #Working It

I go for two kinds of men. The kind with muscles, and the kind without.
-- Mae West

#Men #Two #Kind

Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.
-- Mae West

#Change #Sarcastic #Witty

Give a man free hands, and you'll know where to find them.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Sexy #Men

Sex with love is the greatest thing in life. But sex without love--that's not so bad either.
-- Mae West

#Sex #Love Is

An ounce of performance is worth pounds of promises.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Business #Commitment

A man's kiss is his signature.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Kissing #Men

I'm no angel, but I've spread my wings a bit.
-- Mae West

#Angel #Wings #Spread

A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Women #Fire

I don't know a lot about politics, but I can recognise a good party man when I see one.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Party #Men

The best way to hold a man is in your arms.
-- Mae West

#Inspirational #Sarcastic #Witty

I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
-- Mae West

#Motivational #Tattoo #Sexy

I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Humorous

Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.
-- Mae West

#Relationship #Boyfriend #Being Single

No one can have everything, so you have to try for what you want most.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Humorous

I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported.
-- Mae West

#Men #Two #Kind

I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.
-- Mae West

#Life #Sexy #Trying

If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning.
-- Mae West

#Coffee #Cups #Euthanasia

There are no good girls gone wrong - just bad girls found out.
-- Mae West

#Girl #Women #Gone

Look your best - who said love is blind?
-- Mae West

#Inspiring #Anniversary #Sexy

A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars, that's subtraction.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Money #Math

Don't marry a man to reform him - that's what reform schools are for.
-- Mae West

#Love #Funny #Marriage

Your real security is yourself. You know you can do it, and they can't ever take that away from you.
-- Mae West

#Inspirational #Real #Away From You

If a little is great, and a lot is better, then way too much is just about right!
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Witty #Humorous

I only read biographies, metaphysics and psychology. I can dream up my own fiction.
-- Mae West

#Sarcastic #Dream #Witty

Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.
-- Mae West

#Funny #Sarcastic #Witty