Henry Beard famous quotes

03-25-2025

Fairway: a narrow strip of mown grass that separates two groups of golfers looking for lost balls in the rough.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Two #Groups
A tap-in is a putt that is short enough to be missed one-handed.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Enough #Missed Ones
Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks - No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard's excellent Tennis for Beginners.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Tennis #Beginners
"Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf
-- Henry Beard

#Lying #Golf #Play
A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Water #Balls
Wear it if it clashes.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Clash
Garden: One of a vast number of free outdoor restaurants operated by charity-minded amateurs in an effort to provide healthful, balanced meals for insects, birds and animals.
-- Henry Beard

#Garden #Animal #Numbers
Chef: Any cook who swears in French.
-- Henry Beard

#Chef #Culinary #Cooks
You do not sew with a fork and I see no reason why you should eat with knitting needles.
-- Henry Beard

#Knitting #Reason #Culinary
A driving range is the place where golfers go to get all the good shots out of their system.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Driving #Range
Few golfers are born with the natural talent for hitting the ball, but every player is blessed with the God-given ability to throw a club.
-- Henry Beard

#Blessed #Golf #Player
Hole in One: an occurence in which a ball is hit directly from the tee into the hole in a single shot by a golfer playing alone.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Balls #Holes
Handicap: an allocation of strokes on one or more holes that permits two golfers of very different ability to do equally poorly on the same course.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Two #Different
It's often necessary to hit a second shot to really appreciate the first one.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Appreciate #Firsts
Advice to anglers: don't take advice from people with missing fingers.
-- Henry Beard

#Fishing #People #Missing
Bulb: potential flower buried in Autumn, never to be seen again.
-- Henry Beard

#Funny #Flower #Autumn
I simply cannot imagine why anyone would eat something slimy served in an ashtray.
-- Henry Beard

#Imagine
Follow through: The part of the swing that takes place after the ball has been hit, but before the club has been thrown.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Swings #Balls
Hoeing: A manual method of severing roots from stems of newly planted flowers and vegetables.
-- Henry Beard

#Weed #Flower #Vegetables
The true definition of a perennial: Any plant which, had it lived, would have bloomed year after year.
-- Henry Beard

#Garden #Years #Definitions
Bets lengthen putts and shorten drives.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf
Nonchalant putts count the same as chalant putts.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Nonchalant
If the wind is in your face, you swing too hard just to get the ball through it; if the wind is at your back, you swing too hard just to see how far you can get the ball to go.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Swings #Wind
When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.
-- Henry Beard

#Golf #Two #Water

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