"The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron."

-- Phyllis Diller

#Funny Quotes #Witty Quotes #Humorous Quotes

“We don't just want what we want because we want it; we want what we want because that's what we've learned to want.”

Source : Hanne Blank (2012). “Straight: The Surprisingly Short History of Heterosexuality”, p.18, Beacon Press
“There is more wisdom in your body than in your deepest philosophy.”
“My friends think its weird that I spray perfume on my feet.”
“Most people die at the last minute; others twenty years beforehand, some even earlier. They are the wretched of the earth.”
“I'm not a good enough musician to like completely master something in a couple of days and turn it around.”

Source : Source: collider.com
“Cannibalism is a radical but realistic solution to the problem of overpopulation.”
“It's just I hate reading the description 'offbeat' about a character in a script, because I, along with Seth Green, Jamie Kennedy and a few others, have cornered the market on 'offbeat.”

Source : "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
“Even in earliest youth my fondest desire was to understand Nature, and thus to come closer to the truth; a truth that I was unable to discover either at school or in church.”

Source : Viktor Schauberger “Living Energies”, Рипол Классик

You may also like:

Bob Hope
Comedian
Carol Burnett
Actress
Carol Channing
Comedian
Don Rickles
Comedian
Joan Rivers
Television Personality
Milton Berle
Comedian
Moms Mabley
Comedian
Red Skelton
Entertainer
Susan Lucci
Actress