"I hate small towns because once you've seen the cannon in the park there's nothing else to do."

#Funny Quotes #Hate Quotes #Boredom Quotes

“If the children already born each have only two children themselves ... in twenty-seven to thirty-five years the population of the world will double.”
“Unless your kid is Pele Jr., they're not going to be able to feed themselves from soccer. If your kid knows how to play soccer, but not make dinner, you have done them a disservice.”
“If you put somebody on a crack pipe and give them a 9 mm Baretta, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure out what's going to happen next.”
“Mr. Clarke played the King all evening as though under constant fear that someone else was about to play the Ace.”
“I would give worlds, could I believe One-half that is profess'd me; Affection! could I think it Thee, When Flattery has caress'd me.”
“If our free society is to endure, those who govern must recognize human dignity and accept the enforcement of constitutional limitations on their power conceived by the Framers . . . . Such recognition will not come from a technical understanding of the organs of government, or the new forms of wealth they administer. It requires something different, something deeper-a personal confrontation with the wellsprings of our society.”
“We've got one life and the older we get the more we come to realize how short it is.”

Source : "His Vampires Do a Lot More Than Just Suck". Interview with Paula Guran, darkecho.com. June 1999.
“In adversity, remember to keep an even mind.”

You may also like:

Bill Cosby
Comedian
Bill Hicks
Comedian
Dick Gregory
Comedian
George Carlin
Comedian
Jonathan Winters
Comedian
Louis C. K.
Comedian
Mort Sahl
Comedian
Richard Pryor
Comedian
Sam Kinison
Comedian