"I like the authentic punk dance you did there. It's like a child dizzy off lemonade"

-- Russell Howard

#Funny Quotes #Children Quotes #Humor Quotes

“I discovered makeup when I was 13, and it changed my life. I started wearing mascara, and overnight, people reacted to me in a very different way - I was more popular and I felt more confident.”

Source : Source: www.glamour.com
“She was a talker, wasn't she?" Bobby Lee said, sliding down the ditch with a yodel. "She would of been a good woman," The Misfit said, "if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life." "Some fun!" Bobby Lee said. "Shut up, Bobby Lee," The Misfit said. "It's no real pleasure in life.”
“You can't predict how much time you will get to embrace your opportunity. You have to go after it with everything you have in you, sacrifice and believe.”
“A year ago, I turned the final page of The Book of the Dead. I don't feel young any more.”
“To be a professional tennis player you need to put in these sort of hours.”
“In every European nation, there have been problems in history when the society was too divided.”
“The measure of the wealth of a nation is indicated by the measure of its protection of its industry; the measure of the poverty of a nation is marked by the degree in which it neglects and abandons the care of its own industry, leaving it exposed to the action of foreign powers.”

Source : Henry Clay, William Branch Giles (1827). “Mr. Clay's Speech on the Tariff: Or, The "American System," So Called ; Or, The Anglican System, in Fact, Introduced Here ; and Perverted in Its Most Material Bearing Upon Society, by the Omission of a System of Corn Laws, for the Protection of Agriculture”, p.80
“I'm no fan of what I've seen health insurance companies do.”

You may also like:

Billy Connolly
Comedian
Dara O Briain
Stand-up comedian
Frankie Boyle
Comedian
Jack Whitehall
Comedian
Jimmy Carr
Comedian
Jon Richardson
Comedian
Michael McIntyre
Stand-up comedian
Russell Brand
Comedian
Sean Lock
Comedian