"A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap."

-- Mitch Hedberg

#Funny Quotes #Witty Quotes #Laughter Quotes

“Woe be to him that reads but one book.”
“If modernist naturalism were true, there would be no objective truth outside of science. In that case right and wrong would be a matter of cultural preference, or political power, and the power already available to modernists ideologies would be overwhelming.”
“Being a Jew is like walking in the wind or swimming: you are touched at all points and conscious everywhere.”
“Greatest god below the sky.”
“It seems that we learn lessons when we least expect them but always when we need them the most, and, the true gift in these lessons always lies in the learning process itself.”
“Individuals of the earlier species had suffered from an almost insurmountable spiritual isolation from one another. Not even lovers, and scarcely even the geniuses with special insight into personality, ever had anything like accurate vision of one another. [T]he most precious gift that a lover could bring to the beloved was not virginity but sexual experience. The union, it was felt, was the more pregnant the more each party could contribute from previous sexual and spiritual intimacy with others.”
“Freedom has its dangers as well as its joys. And the sooner we learn to get up after a fall, the better off we'll be.”
“I'm married to Metallica.”

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