"I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that."

-- Mitch Hedberg

#Funny Quotes #Girlfriend Quotes #Dating Quotes

“I can remember the very spot in the road, whilst in my carriage, when to my joy the solution occurred to me.”
“I work in L.A. from time to time.”
“I don't chart out the life histories of the people I play. If I did, I'd be in trouble. I work with my heart and my head, and naturally emotions follow.”

Source : "Ernest Borgnine, rugged actor with range, dies", www.sfgate.com. July 8, 2012.
“I don't have great thighs. I have very big breasts and a soft, fatty little tummy. And I've got back fat. People assume that I'm walking around in little spaghetti-strap dresses. It's insidious - Glam Jamie, the Perfect Jamie, the great figure, blah, blah, blah. And I don't want the unsuspecting 40-year-old women of the world to think that I've got it going on. It's such a fraud. And I'm the one perpetuating it.”
“I'll give up this sort of touring madness certainly, but music-everything is based on music. No, I'll never stop my music.”
“Caring for others is the basis of worldly success.”
“It is desirable for Buddhist affairs to help civilian rule.”
“It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out; it's the grain of sand in your shoe.”

Source : "Sand: The Never-ending Story". Book by Michael Welland, p. 30, 2009.

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