"'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that 'I do' is the longest sentence?"

-- George Carlin

#Funny Quotes #Marriage Quotes #Sarcastic Quotes

“I bought my son a bat for Christmas. On New Year's it flew away.”
“A government afraid of its citizens is a Democracy. Citizens afraid of government is tyranny!”
“People moved in across the street and are immediately cutting down a huge tree. Their toothbrushes will know my buttonhole.”
“I look white to a lot of people. And I'm not. I'm African-American. I'm mixed. I like to call myself Mulatto because that definition fits. So, you know, I've dealt with the conflict my whole life between how I look and my actual ethnic and racial identity.”

Source : "Mat Johnson On 'Loving Day' And Life As A 'Black Boy' Who Looks White". "Fresh Air" with Terry Gross, www.npr.org. June 29, 2015.
“The first reason for psychology's failure to understand what people are and how they act, is that clinicians and psychiatrists, who are generally the theoreticians on these matters, have essentially made up myths without any evidence to support them; the second reason for psychology's failure is that personality theory has looked for inner traits when it should have been looking for social context.”
“You will be consoled according to the greatness of your sorrow and affliction; the greater the suffering, the greater will be the reward.”
“I'm not physically harming any of these people by being high, and it's just interesting to see that I feel like my values and morals don't change at all when I'm high, but that's a constant. The thing that changes when I'm high is I am happier, and I'm not good with numbers.”

Source : Source: www.avclub.com
“I've been married 34 years. I have not been a perfect man. I have made mistakes in my life.”

Source : Interview with Connie Chung, www.deseretnews.com. August 24, 2001.

You may also like:

Alex Winter
Actor
Bill Hicks
Comedian
Bill Maher
Comedian
Johnny Carson
Host
Lenny Bruce
Comedian
Louis C. K.
Comedian
Richard Pryor
Comedian
Sam Kinison
Comedian
Kelly Carlin-McCall
Actress