"Workaholicism is such a tough addiction to get over. I had to divorce my wife because she was an enabler."

-- Dave Mordal

#Funny Quotes #Divorce Quotes #Wife Quotes

“I felt myself in a solitude so frightful that I contemplated suicide. What held me back was the idea that no one, absolutely no one, would be moved by my death, that I would be even more alone in death than in life.”
“I was hired as a sous-chef at a restaurant on the Upper East Side. The chef liked to drink - some mornings we would find him sleeping. Two weeks after its opening, I became the chef. I was 20 years old, and way over my head. I had to hire the cooks and do the menus.”
“I don't think that people should wear dresses two sizes too small. I just think that sexiness is better left to the imagination. It's just more tasteful.”
“If I don't like someone and I start reading their stuff, it seems like my brain will just automatically start criticizing everything that's there. It's really hard to read a book without having all this outside information telling you what to think about it.”
“Single men and determined groups have been the only makers of space in which man could walk free.”
“I am one of a rare breed of true politicians who definitely say what they may or may not mean with absolute certainty.”
“If it makes you laugh, if it makes you cry, if it rips out your heart, that's a good picture.”
“Whatever you have is gonna die and you are gonna have to rebirth something new. You have to be willing to ride the waves.”

You may also like:

Cathy Ladman
Comedian
Dan Cummins
Comedian
Dat Phan
Comedian
Jay London
Comedian
Jeff Cesario
Actor
Ralphie May
Comedian
Rich Vos
Comedian
Tim Slagle
Comedian
Alonzo Bodden
Comedian