"When I tried to hit puberty I swung and I missed."

-- Bo Burnham

#Funny Quotes #Comedy Quotes #Puberty Quotes

“I wish my mother had left me something about how she felt growing up. I wish my grandmother had done the same. I wanted my girls to know me.”
“The European community of values is unique: It combines democracy with the market economy, individual freedoms with social justice. How can we expect the U.S. or China to defend these values, this one-of-a-kind European balancing act that has developed over the course of decades?”
“To the sick man the physician when he enters seems to have three faces, those of a man, a devil, a god. When the physician first comes and announces the safety of the patient, then the sick man says: "Behold a God or a guardian angel!”
“I think it all started with the tuna sandwich, and then, on the road, gearing up for New York, Nick [Kroll] and John [Mulaney] had the idea of having a tuna puppet, which became Tony Tuna, and their friend Cammi Upton designed that and did a great job.”

Source : Source: www.avclub.com
“For war there is always enough. It's peace that's expensive.”

Source : Joseph Heller (2016). “Closing Time”, p.226, Simon and Schuster
“Even today I cannot believe that people who lived together could inflict horrible pain on each other.”
“Raising taxes doesn't create jobs, and this is a common sense thing. Washington doesn't get it. They believe if they take more money and send it to Washington, D.C. somehow they create wealth. It doesn't work.”

Source : "Erin Burnett Outfront", www.cnn.com. December 9, 2011.
“When the signal is weak, the phone is working more, you drain the battery faster, so only use a phone when the signal is weak in a true emergency.”

Source : Source: www.salon.com

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