"One of the first things they teach you in Driver's Ed is where to put your hands on the steering wheel. They tell you put 'em at ten o'clock and two o' clock. Never mind that . I put mine at 9:45 and 2:17. Gives me an extra half hour to get where I'm goin'."

-- George Carlin

#Humorous Quotes #Hands Quotes #Two Quotes

“I used to believe I was going to live forever. And then you suddenly become aware that you're not.”

Source : Interview with Anthony Haden-Guest, www.interviewmagazine.com. November 23, 2008.
“People who go to work every day and perform the services essential to keeping our economy functioning deserve to live above the poverty level.”
“My power vanishes into thin air the instant that my fellow citizens, who are straight and honest, cease to believe that I represent them and fight for what is straight and honest. That is all the strength that I have.”
“Talk about meeting your soul mate ... I truly feel I have been given that gift. And believe me, I wasn't some lightweight package. I'm, like, the package that didn't just come with luggage - I had trunks.”
“I am a musicologist, a doctor of music. Therefore I listened to, studied and analysed a lot of music. I also enjoy metaphors, the art of quoting and of cycles.”
“Religion has become so many different things. Religion is an economic thing for some people. Religion is a gun.”
“That quality is what makes women great collaborators; we understand it's a team effort. Even if it comes from society telling us to be polite.”

Source : Source: www.elle.com
“First of all, you're improvising through a puppet, so you're not always yourself: you're a cow or you're a pig or you're an old woman, you know, whatever puppet you pick, or you're a demon, you know, whatever you pick up, that's what you get to be in the scene.”

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