"When I was a kid, I never did funny things to get attention. I was never a funny person. I was never, like, 'Oh, wow. I could say this some day on stage.'"

-- Steven Wright

#Kids Quotes #Funny Things Quotes #Wow Quotes

“All day my mind drifts off into fantasies and little stupid jokes.”

Source : Source: www.avclub.com
“The bill then says if the Senate does not act, then H.R. 1 (the House-passed bill that cuts $61 billion) will be the law of the land. In addition to that, it says that if all else fails, and the Senate brings about a shutdown, then members should not get their pay.”

Source : "House Republicans plan symbolic bill to pressure Senate on shutdown" by Felicia Sonmez, www.washingtonpost.com. March 30, 2011.
“I've been thinking of death a lot, and I am amazed by its inevitability, frightened, as we all are, of the totally unknown, and yet feel a long sleep is somehow earned by those of us who live on the edge.”
“The organic constitution of the Church is not immutable; but Christian society, just as human society, is subject to perpetual evolution.”
“We imagine that waking-life is real and that dream-life is unreal, but there does not seem to be any evidence for this belief.”
“Eight hours of sleep would be amazing. That would be the best. If I could just figure out that part of my life, it would be great.”

Source : Source: collider.com
“I realized the true function of a lawyer was to unite parties riven asunder. The lesson was so indelibly burnt into me that a large part of my time during the twenty years of my practice as a lawyer was occupied in bringing about private compromises of hundreds of cases. I lost nothing thereby -- not even money, certainly not my soul.”
“I can be shy, but Iâ€™m not really. I try to be better at overcoming these things people have said.”

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