"The Post Office is very careful nowadays. When they get a package marked "Fragile," they throw it underhand."

-- Milton Berle

#Christmas Quotes #Office Quotes #Post Office Quotes

“The complexities of adult life get in the way of the truth.”
“Faith is a continuum, and we each fall on that line where we may.”
“What concerns me when I work, is not whether the picture is a landscape, or whether it's pastoral, or whether somebody will see a sunset in it. What concerns me is - did I make a beautiful picture?”

Source : "Artful Survivor". Interview with Deborah Salomon, www.nytimes.com. May 14, 1989.
“In my vocabulary there are two bad words: art and good taste.”
“But the people of the church in Jerusalem had been commanded by a revelation, vouchsafed to approved men there before the war, to leave the city and to dwell in a certain town of Perea called Pella.”
“The Gadianton Robbers from the Book of Mormon are loose among us. The King-men, and women, are running our government. And, worst of all, we are blindly electing them, or appointing them so they can continue to destroy the things we cherish most.”
“I don't understand shopping, it doesn't make any sense to me. As guys, we decide we want something and then we go out and buy it. Women go to the store having no idea what they're going to buy, or what they're even doing, it's like a whole different sport. It's like going to a football game to maybe watch a game. I don't get it.”
“Our life is composed of events and states of mind. How ewe appraise our life from our deathbed will be predicated not only on what came to us in life but how we lived with it. It will not be simply illness or health, riches or poverty, good luck or bad, which ultimately define whether we believe we have had a good life or not, but the quality of our relationship to these situations: the attitudes of our states of mind. (34)”

You may also like:

Andrew Dice Clay
Comedian
Bob Hope
Comedian
Don Rickles
Comedian
George Burns
Comedian
Jack Benny
Comedian
Jerry Lewis
Comedian
Jimmy Durante
Singer
Red Skelton
Entertainer
Sid Caesar
Actor