"My wife's gotten really lazy, or as she calls it, 'pregnant.'"

-- Jim Gaffigan

#Wife Quotes #Lazy Quotes #My Wife Quotes

“People who have visions should go see a doctor.”
“Both me and my wife's extended family all live within a 50-mile radius. Like me, a lot of them did time in London then started drifting back to the countryside and the sea. Perhaps it's a homing instinct.”
“The truth emerging from this scattered picture of nuclear proliferation is simple: there is a stronger chance of a nuclear bomb being used now than at almost any point in the Cold War.”

Source : "Will we wake from our nuclear coma?". JohannHari.com, October 20, 2004.
“I'm a character actress, plain and simple...Who can worry about a career? Have a life. Movie stars have careers - actors work, and then they don't work, and then they work again.”

Source : "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
“I want to make the most out of the word â€˜fame.â€™ I want to do good things with my fame, or whatever it is. I want to help and do charity work. Thereâ€™s something going on in Chile right now with the water, so I think Iâ€™m going to down there in a month to help out. My grandfather worked with charities his whole entire life, and we grew up living with him. He always told me about the other side of the world and everything thatâ€™s going on.”
“However, the Administration's plan to privatize Social Security will undermine retirement security for all Americans by cutting guaranteed benefits by more than 40 percent, and risky private accounts won't make up for the loss of benefits for millions of Americans.”
“There are no whys in a person's life, and very few hows. In the end, in search of useful wisdom, you could only come back to the most hackneyed concepts, like kindness, forbearance, infinite patience. Solomon and Lincoln: This too shall pass. Damn right it will. Or Chekhov: Nothing passes. Equally true.”
“Peer pressure is something everyone will face in school. You have to really go by what you think is the right thing to do. Turn to the friends you trust the most when you are put in a compromising situation. If your friends are making the wrong decision, then turn to your parents.”

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