"I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks."

-- Totie Fields

#Failure Quotes #Food Quotes #Two Quotes

“I treated Art as the supreme reality and life as a mere mode of fiction.”
“I still get very high and very low in life. Daily. But I've finally accepted the fact that sensitive is just how I was made, that I don't have to hide it and I don't have to fix it. I'm not broken.”
“Somebody out there was trying to use my language and trying to speak for me. Rather than have that happen, I thought I'd do it myself. It's a fun thing. It's a way for fans to connect.”
“I think the fundamentals of the economy are finally in the electronic economy and they are strong are we have reason for great optimism.”
“You've met Nick?" "Yep, we've met, all right. He was kind enough to inform me that I have absolutely no say in whether you two date." "Well, you don't." "You know, you all could at least pretend that my opinion makes a difference.”
“Untested faith was rarely strong. Deep, abiding faith was tempered through fire.”
“The first [quality] to be named must always be the power of attention, of giving one's whole mind to the patient without the interposition of anything of oneself. It sounds simple but only the very greatest doctors ever fully attain it. ... The second thing to be striven for is intuition. This sounds an impossibility, for who can control that small quiet monitor? But intuition is only interference from experience stored and not actively recalled. ... The last aptitude I shall mention that must be attained by the good physician is that of handling the sick man's mind.”
“It isn't true that you live only once. You only die once. You live lots of times if you know how.”

You may also like:

Buddy Hackett
Comedian
Don Rickles
Comedian
Joan Rivers
Television Personality
Lenny Bruce
Comedian
Lucille Ball
Comedienne
Merv Griffin
Host
Moms Mabley
Comedian
Phyllis Diller
Comedienne
Sophie Tucker
Singer