"I set a personal record on Christmas. I got my shopping done three weeks ahead of time. I had all the presents back at my apartment, I was halfway through wrapping them, and I realized, 'Damn, I used the wrong wrapping paper.' The paper I used said, 'Happy Birthday.' I didn't want to waste it, so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it."

-- Demetri Martin

#Jesus Quotes #Funny Christmas Quotes #Shopping Quotes

“It's not that I'm rebelling. It's that I'm just trying to find another way.”

Source : "Edie : Girl On Fire". Book by David Weisman and Melissa Painter, 2006.
“I felt exactly like the man in the advertisement who has not devoted fifteen minutes a day to the study of the classics. If only (I thought) I had devoted fifteen minutes a day to the cultivation of the aesthetic attitude! I could bound Afghanistan.”

Source : "Contemporary Reminiscences". Arts & Decoration, Vol. 26, (p. 50), 1927.
“You can't stop time. You can't capture light. You can only turn your face up and let it rain down.”
“Same thing, like my commercials are often times really funny because I tend to find 30 seconds is a really good amount of time to tell a joke.”

Source : "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
“All partisan movements add to the fullness of our understanding of society as a whole. They never detract; or, in any case, one must not allow them to do so. Experience adds to experience.”
“On television I feel like a man playing piano in a brothel; every now and again he solaces himself by playing 'Abide with Me' in the hope of edifying both the clients and the inmates”
“This is a matter of public health. The public was sick and tired of DeLay and his corruption.”
“The mile has a classic symmetry....It's a play in four acts.”

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