"People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant."

-- Ellen DeGeneres

#Inspirational Quotes #Funny Quotes #Hilarious Quotes

“Sail on, O Ship of State! Sail on, O Union, strong and great.”
“The single biggest lesson I learned was when a hire isn't working out fire them fast. My biggest mistakes, and where I've seen the worst results, were when I gave someone too many chances, or let a situation drift on for too long because I couldn't bring myself to terminate it.”

Source : "How Cindy Gallop Broke Through the "Thick Layer of Men" and Became the Counterpoint to Porn". Interview with Leslie Bradshaw, www.forbes.com. August 10, 2011.
“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own... Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy.”
“I have a fantastic method for anti-ageing. It's eating. Plumps out your skin beautifully.”
“I'm really excited about my TV show. I wrote it with my best friend.”
“To its devotees the bowtie suggests iconoclasm of an Old World sort, a fusty adherence to a contrarian point of view. The bowtie hints at intellectualism, real or feigned, and sometimes suggests technical acumen, perhaps because it is so hard to tie. BowTies are worn by magicians, country doctors, lawyers and professors and by people hoping to look like the above. But perhaps most of all, wearing a bow tie is a way of broadcasting an aggressive lack of concern for what other people think.”
“We all fear change, even as we seek it.”
“You don't go to Gettysburg with a shovel, you don't take belt buckles off the Arizona.”

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