"I want to be able to make people laugh as hard as they possibly can, and I really think they need that."

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Source : "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

Andrew Dice Clay

#Thinking Quotes #People Quotes #Laughing Quotes

“If love does not know how to give and take without restrictions, it is not love, but a transaction that never fails to lay stress on a plus and a minus.”
“LAOCOON, n. A famous piece of antique scripture representing a priest of that name and his two sons in the folds of two enormous serpents. The skill and diligence with which the old man and lads support the serpents and keep them up to their work have been justly regarded as one of the noblest artistic illustrations of the mastery of human intelligence over brute inertia.”
“Whatever I design, it has to please my eye. If I go to work on an office block, I'll draw the office that I want to walk into. If it's a piece of crystal, it must feel the way I want it to feel in my hand. If it's women's wear, it must be something I'd like to see my wife dressed in.”
“Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles.”
“I'm such an awful faker. Everything that comes out of my mouth needs to be the real deal. Not that I ever try to be deceiving, but sometimes it takes a while to find your voice and find what you want to say.”
“The real meaning of persona is a mask, such as actors were accustomed to wear on the ancient stage; and it is quite true that no one shows himself as he is, but wears his mask and plays his part. Indeed, the whole of our social arrangements may be likened to a perpetual comedy; and this is why a man who is worth anything finds society so insipid, while a blockhead is quite at home in it.”
“The footprints of an Angel in your life are Love.”
“With women, I've got a long bamboo pole with a leather loop on the end. I slip the loop around their necks so they can't get away or come too close. Like catching snakes.”

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