"So there I was lying in the gutter. A man stopped and asked '"What's the matter? Did you fall over?" So I said "No. I've a bar of toffee in my back pocket and I was just trying to break it.""

-- Chic Murray

#Funny Quotes #Lying Quotes #Fall Quotes

“Appeasement is a vote to live in the present tense, to hold the comforts of the moment.”
“If fashion pollutes it should no longer be called fashion, it should be called pollution.”
“It would be quite good to be a Formula 1 [racecar] driver.”
“Your father always tries to see the good side of people; to find the excuse. But sometimes there isn't a good side. There isn't an excuse. (Mom - to Lara Lington)”
“The sparkle and morning-freshness of the shop, and the butter-conjuring girl, formed a mind-picture which accompanied the whole of my youth.(about the Buttercup Dairy)”
“Flatulency today consists in saying simply in several different ways the same thing over and over again.”

Source : Henry Seidel Canby (1926). “Better Writing”
“Libertarians should say, 'I love this country too much to take away votes from the Republican'”
“I hooked up with director Jacques Audiard for this film called 'Rust & Bone' with Marion Cotillard. I loved that experience so much I'm truly sad that it's over!”

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