"Wherever a Scotsman goes, here goes Burns. His grand whole, catholic soul squares with the good of all; therefore we find him in everything, everywhere."

“I have been thinking that I would make a proposition to my Republican friends... that if they will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them.”

Source : Campaign remark, Fresno, Cal., 10 Sept. 1952. John F. Parker, in "If Elected, I Promise ...": Stories and Gems of Wisdom by and About Politicians (1969), attributes the reverse statement to Chauncey Depew (1834 - 1928): "If you will refrain from telling any lies about the Republican party, I'll promise not to tell the truth about the Democrats."

“The investor with a portfolio of sound stocks should expect their prices to fluctuate and should neither be concerned by sizable declines nor become excited by sizable advances. He should always remember that market quotations are there for his convenience, either to be taken advantage of or to be ignored.”

“Justice will prevail!”

“Well, you won't unless you come to lunch with me," Cal said. "I'm holding it for ransom. There's a gun to its heel right now." "I have lunch at my desk," Min began, and thought,Oh, for crying out loud, could I beany more pathetic ? "Emilio is experimenting with a lunch menu. He needs you. I need you.”

“... there are two types of happiness and I have chosen that of the murderers. For I am happy. There was a time when I thought I had reached the limit of distress. Beyond that limit, there is a sterile and magnificent happiness.”

“An idea is a feat of association, and the height of it is a good metaphor.”

“You'll regret the day you ever messed with Philadelphia Collins and sons”

“Most of the problems with the bodies and minds of the folks occupying the current culture involve an unwillingness to do anything hard, or anything that they'd rather not do. I applaud your resolve, and I welcome you to the community of people who have decided that EASY will no longer suffice.”