"It is not “just beer,” it is a noble and ancient beverage which, like wine, food and television advertising, can be extraordinarily good or unmercifully bad."

“Physical beauty is such a strange thing.”

“You know how it is with writing. You just write what you want to write. There's no way to predict what is good or bad. You just do what you think is funny, and either it works or you're finished. It's impossible to predict anything.”

Source : Interview with Nathan Rabin, www.avclub.com. June 18, 2003.

“I'm just a kid from Bronx who got lucky.”

“He did not study God; he was dazzled by him.”

“The same prudence which in private life would forbid our paying our own money for unexplained projects, forbids it in the dispensation of the public moneys.”

“Those who are born of parents broken with old age, or of such as are not yet ripe or are too young, or of drunkards, soft or effeminate men, want a great and liberal ingenuity or wit.”

Source : "Psychological problems in mental deficiency" by Seymour B. Sarason, p. 211, 1969.

“Reading is a very different thing than performing. In fact, one of the things I think that doesn't work in books on tape is if the person doing the reading "acts" too much; it becomes irritating to you listening to it.”

“The people in Tacloban have great dignity and deserve better than what they have gotten”