"I haven't been hit since Leon Spinks hit me in '92."

-- Zach Galifianakis

“Life as a therapist is ruthless; circumstances that are helpful to one neurotic may crush another.”
“The first rule of world-building is available physics, which basically means that if you want it to feel real, it has to follow the same rules as this world, from gravity to how human behaviour works. If you have a fantasy element that doesnt obey the laws of physics, make sure that it has a fantasy explanation.”
“I live in my own little world. But its ok, they know me here.”
“It's not like Alaska isn't wilderness - it mostly is. But most Alaskans don't live in the wild. They live on the edge of the wild in towns with schools and cable TV and stores and dentists and roller rinks sometimes. It's just like anyplace else, only with mountains and moose.”
“Sometimes I don't tell the truth, which is telling the truth about not telling the truth. I think people don't tell the truth when they're afraid that something bad's going to happen if they tell the truth. I say things all the time that I could really get into trouble for, but they kind of blow over.”
“I don't mean to sound - I don't want it to come out funny, but I don't like show business. I love - I love acting in films. I love it.”
“I'm standing for real freedom.”
“How much intelligence does it take to sneak up on a leaf?”

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