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“I had my first apartment when I was 16. I got good grades, so my friends would be able to come over to 'study.' We'd party, and they'd cheat off me. Everybody won!”
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“I like the fact that in ancient Chinese art the great painters always included a deliberate flaw in their work: human creation is never perfect.”
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“I remember once having to stop performing when I thought an elderly man a few rows back from the front was actually going to die because he was laughing so hard.”
Source : "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com. 
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“Because I can’t live without Della. I don’t want to. She’s the reason I get up in the mornings - Woods”
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“Life passes by now like the scenery outside a car window. I breathe and eat and sleep as I always did, but there seems to be no great purpose in my life that requires active participation on my part...I do not know where I am going or when I will get there.”
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“We don't want to start a nuclear war unless we really have to, now do we Jack?”
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“When you don't have any money, the problem is food. When you have money, it's sex. When you have both, it's health. If everything is simply jake, then you're frightened of death”
Source : The Ginger Man ch. 5 (1955)
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“Escapology has one thing going for it that probably made Harry Houdini such a superstar in his day and a legend in the present. Everyone wants to escape from something. Taxes, contracts, illness, work, the multitude of burdens that we chafe under are shadows from which we want to escape.”
