"Reading the features you would get the impression that this year's crop of rods will allow you to cast from here to eternity, with a rod so light you need to tie it to your wrist to stop it blowing away."

“I have never seen a greater monster or miracle in the world than myself.”

“The only thing a star asks is to be allowed to twinkle.”

“To accept a favor is to sell one's freedom. -Beneficium accipere libertatem est vendere”

“I was an angel of the desert. In your arms I broke my wings.”

“One of the pleasantest things about book writing is that sometimes it brings one in touch with old friends.”

“Homophobia and the closet are allies. Like an unhealthy co-dependent relationship they need each other to survive. One plays the victim living in fear and shame while the other plays the persecutor policing what is ‘normal’. The only way to dismantle homophobia is for every gay man and lesbian in the world to come out and live authentic lives. Once they realise how normal we are and see themselves in us….the controversy is over.”

“When you get over the anxiety, you discover you should have been mad a long time ago.”

“I don't know what people who I've never met think about me. Some have written horrible things, some have written nice things - but I'm proud of the fact I've remained close to everyone I've ever worked with.”

Source : "Ben Elton applauds 'vibrant' standup comedy scene" by Matt Trueman, www.theguardian.com. May 15, 2012.