"I thought I'd be living a much more bohemian life and be very poor. I never thought I'd do comedy or be married living in the suburbs. Every time I try to plan my life out it just doesn't come to pass, and I think that's a great experience."

-- Michael Ian Black

#Thinking Quotes #Trying Quotes #Comedy Quotes

“Now, no matter what the mullah teaches, there is only one sin, only one. And that is theft. Every other sin is a variation of theft.”
“I'm an advocate for gay marriage. I have more gay friends than Carter has pills.”

Source : "Patti Stanger Makes More Anti-Gay Comments on 'Joy Behar' Show" by Lindsay Powers, www.hollywoodreporter.com. September 27, 2011.
“I remember my agent at the time called me and was like, "I've got it! I've found it! I've found your role!" I worked my ***** off to get that role, because I think me and three or four other girls tested for it. But it was a great time.”
“Golf requires only a few simple Rules and Regulations to guide the players in the true nature of its sporting appeal. The spirit of the game is its own referee.”
“A desk is a dangerous place from which to view the world.”
“All my life I've dealt with politicians. I know politicians better than anybody. And honestly, if you can't deal with a politician, there's something wrong with you.”
“The average American teenager sends or receives 75 text messages a day, though one girl in Sacramento managed to handle an average of 10,000 every 24 hours for a month.”
“The man with but one idea in his head is sure to exaggerate that to top-heaviness, and thus he loses his equilibrium.”

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