"How to become a media star: Be a Republican who bucks the party line. How to be ignored by media: Be a Democrat who bucks party line."

“You throw a perfectly straight line at the audience and then, right at the end, you curve it. Good jokes do that.”

“You can't choose your childhood, it's just what happens to you. But after that you choose. And that's really what (makes you).”

“The second rector of [St. John's in] Providence was blown out of church one Sunday by 'an extraordinary gust of wind,' and the people, welcoming this ejection as an act of heaven, refused to let him in again.”

“The religion of the future will be cosmic religion. It will transcend personal God and avoid dogma and theology.”

“The Simpsons are ugly-looking, and they should be. That's what works. That's one of the things that's funny.”

“To the contrary, I believe the U.S. military has already done all that has been asked of them. Saddam Hussein is on trial. The threat from alleged weapons of mass destruction programs in Iraq has been neutralized.”

“A good part - and definitely the most fun part - of being a feminist is about frightening men.”

Source : "International Women’s Day Quotes: 16 Inspirational Feminist Quotes for IWD 2017". metro.co.uk. March 06, 2017.

“Every lie is a poison; there are no harmless lies. Only the truth is safe. Only the truth gives me consolation - it is the one unbreakable diamond.”